Sunday, August 30, 2009

I'm the Bad Dog ?? I wasn't the one in Jail!!!! :)

I, Farfel, the ONLY Airedale in the Village .... loves to go in the car with MOMMY! I do lick the windows, and have a difficult time sitting in one place -- it's soooo hard to decide!! Front seat -- back seat -- front floor -- head out the back windows -- front windows -- moon roof???? I do get nose prints (quite beautiful) all over the windows, but mostly -- MOMMY loves me as a passenger!!!

MOMMY'S Gym is right next to a Pet Store -- not the kind that sells puppies or furry animals, but the kind that sells VERMIN, reptiles, and fish!! It is a pet-friendly store and while MOMMY is on her beloved Elliptical machine, she watches the dogs walk in and out of the store with their humines. MOMMY thought --- Hmmmm, maybe I could take Farfel into the store --- one day!!!!! Hahaha, well, today was the day!!!!!

First she walked me by the window of the Gym -- they do not allow canines in there --NOT that I would want to go into that smelly, noisy, disco music playing place -- MOMMY waved to the pretty employees with their really cute Adidas outfits on!! MOMMY thinks they are only there for decoration. They don't really know anything about high-intensity or low-intensity workouts. They say things like .. for sure, whatever, like, and they are usually texting... hahah very fast... so anyway ....

We go into the store. MOMMY was in the treat section!!! The treats were beautiful. They set out a buffet for me -- a smorgasbord, hors d'oeuvres!! I felt to honored!! So, while MOMMY was oooohing and ahhhhhhing over a big white poodle -- who wanted NOTHING to do with me...I decided to sample the buffet!!!! All of a sudden... MOMMY says........NO!!!!! A few other words were coming out of her mouth like... shoplifting, thievery, and STEALING!!!!! She did not see it as a buffet!!!! My question ... why would these tasty morsels be out in the open loose... with the aroma begging me to taste them???? OK, so Miss Snooty... who was sitting there watching... like a gooooooooood dog... didn't try any -- but... why would they honor her??????? I am Farfel -- the ONLY Airedale in the Village -- she is not!!!

To make matters worse -- MOMMY decided to check out this grey creature in a big cage!! She was pulling me further away from the FOOD!!!! I wondered what this feathered guy had done to be incarcerated like he was ---- THEN .. as soon as MOMMY walked up to him he whistled at her --- Damn him!!! That's MY MOMMY!!! I started snorting... he then said.. hello, hello, in a totally stupid voice!! I had to growl at that point... MOMMY kept trying to calm me down... then the feathered thing started flapping his wings... I think I may have intimidated him!!! THEN -- with that totally stupid little voice he had, he said... (are you ready for this?) BAD DOG!!!! Like 5 times!!!!!!! DAMN HIM! MOMMY was laughing... and so was everybody else in the place -- DAMN THEM too!!! He mocked me. Grrrrr!

We couldn't leave soon enough!! I was happy to get out of that torturous place -- even IF the food was good!!!! MOMMY was still laughing in the car... making her voice sound like that dumb Parrot!! She was also calling me a shoplifter, and told me how lucky I was that I wasn't sent to prison.......I was happy to see MOMMY laugh --- but at the same time.... annoyed -- BUT, not for long!!! MOMMY bought me a few pigs ears... I was happy!!!!!

I will have to plot my course the next time I go in there ---- I will avoid the ...."JAILBIRD!" Hahahaha .. and make sure I do not snatch a treat ---- unless... nobody is looking :)


What would you do if you were in a pet store and an annoying Grey Parrot escaped from it's jail cell?

What would Farfel do ?



(Just kidding -- sort of!)

There are more blogs to come -- it just take MOMMY forever in her lameness to type them...ugh!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Finally, No more Cable guys!

I, Farfel, the ONLY Airedale in the Village (in my neighborhood, not THE Village in NY, although MOMMY wishes it was) ... will finally write another blog!!!!! First, I have to thank EVERYBODY for the very nice and wonderful comments!! It is so nice to meet all of you!!! Special thanks to my Lovely Miss Fergi, Jake, and their Moma for ALL of their help!!! MOMMY even talked to Fergi's Moma on the phone -- I was so excited!!!! So was MOMMY!!!

So -- the problemS -- yes, there were several!!! First, the desktop caught a horrible virus -- it's done! Second, the laptop wouldn't continuously hook up to the cable -- even though we have all the cards and stuff, and anyway it's all too technical..but it would hook up to the neighbor's cable!!! We were accidentally stealing cable!!! OK -- not so bad, but it would just quit!! That's bad, MOMMY was frustrated, and it's never a good idea to have a frustrated MOMMY -- hehehe!! Soooo, after like 92 visits from the cable company --- 5 different technicians ... and about as many routers, it's ..... hopefully fixed!!! Another problem -- MOMMY'S uncle passed away -- yeah.. he was 84 and died on the golf course -- actually IN the golf cart -- but MOMMY talked her cousin into changing the story. She thought it was more interesting if he died right after making an Eagle -- a hole-in-one would have been unbelievable!!! MOMMY'S cousin liked that idea, and so the story was changed. MOMMY was busy with the funeral and all of her cousins she hadn't seen since the last funeral -- weird how death seems to bring everybody together when ... they should really just hang out for fun!!

MOMMY and I know we are going to love blogging here. We totally enjoy reading every one's posts, and we love all of the pictures!!! So many creative humines, canines, and lovely personalities!!!!

This video portrays my evil nemesis humine brother Joey and I!!! He lives to antagonize me, but ... in this video he is rubbing my ears. I am sure he has an ulterior motive. He thinks he is MOMMY'S favorite -- it's sad -- he is not. I am :)

I hope you all enjoy the video -- and I am so glad to hear from all of you!!! I am also very happy I am in a relationship with the lovely Miss Fergi --To all of the pretty little ladies who have commented, thank you very much!! You're all beautiful, but ----my heart belongs to that sweet little swimmer Miss Fergi (sigh).

More blogging to come -- as long as the router holds out!! UGH!!!

W.W.F.D. (What would Farfel do?)

What would you do if your OLD single MOMMY had a gentleman friend come over to pick her up for a date (UGH!)?

The best thing to do is to greet the gentleman at the door as politely as possible -- and when you hear him say "Wow.. so well-behaved for such a big guy," you go to your water bowl, drink a few pints ... make sure it collects in your beard (if you have one), then... lovingly (hahaha) put your head in the gentleman's lap ... after (Airedale's only -- seems like a thing we do) wiping your face on their shins!!!!! YEP!!! That's what Farfel would do... and... I can speak from experience :) Hehehehe !!!

Friday, August 14, 2009

Heeerreee's Farfel!


I, Farfel, the ONLY Airedale in the Village, will attempt to write my first really important Blog on a real official blogging site. I am excited.

I have decided, as the wonderfully insightful Airedale that I am, to write about my MOMMY and I! I refer to my MOMMY in capital letters. OK, yes, she is a little bit full of herself, but if I had my choice, I would put her name in neon lights, or better yet, hire the Goodyear blimp to fly with “MOMMY” attached to the back of the blimp! Not MOMMY, but the letters! (Ya know.. the Goodyear blimp is here in Akron – I can just picture MOMMY flying on the tail end… hehehe)

I might call this MOMMY and Me. Whatever it is called, it will show the love my MOMMY has for me and I have for her. Maybe it will be a best seller, maybe a movie – kind of like Marley and Me! I will need different actresses to play MOMMY at various times of her life. I think she would like Angelina Jolie – who wouldn’t? The one person I don’t think MOMMY wants in the movie is Chrissie Hynde – for various reasons – hehehe

MOMMY and I have been together since April 18, 2002. MOMMY turned 56 this year, and on January 16, 2010, I will be 8-years old – 56 in humine years! It makes us happy that we will be the same age at the same time! We make each other happy. MOMMY whispers to me every night – YES! I allow her a spot in my large humine bed… she is my MOMMY after all! Anyway, she whispers to me; “Good night Farfel, I am so glad I have you!” MOMMY doesn’t remember telling anybody else those words except for those humine children and the grandheathens. I am glad I make MOMMY happy.

So, I guess I will be blogging about MOMMY and me! No, it won’t be all mushy and sappy! Thinking about titles now .. A Girl and her dog ---- well, she is an old girl.. hehehe… A dog and his MOMMY … nope.. no ring to that one…. I will think of something. For now… I just want to put something in so my blog isn’t empty…hehehe…

OH ------ one of the most VERRRY important things …. I am in a relationship with the Lovely Miss Fergi!! She is a lovely, delicate, sweet .. (sigh, I am in love) Wire Fox Terrier! Her totally cool brother Jake is my best friend! I love their Mommy, and that really pretty girl who lives with them! MOMMY and I love their blogs! MOMMY gets watery eyes, even with the happy stuff! Anyway, I am glad to be here … and I hope I don’t disappoint anybody – OH – MOMMY is very technologically inept … it might take years to figure this out -- as far as adding links and pictures – but she is trying!

Farfel E. Pluribus Unum

(MOMMY makes new names for me -- she is odd, but sweet and harnless)

MOMMY has made a list of -- W.W.F. D. (What would Farfel do) Like I said, MOMMY is odd .. and thinks totally unfunny things are funny -- but, I want to include my W.W.F.D in my blogs!


You are walking down the street, and you see a $10.00 bill lying in the road -- W.W.F.D ----

I, Farfel, the ONLY Airedale in the Village would .... sniff it --- figure out there is no food value ... and... continue to walk with my nose to the ground .. hoping to encounter those elderly, frail ladies, with the tiny little dogs -- on those maddening retractable leashes! I am quite imposing .. when up against the oldsters and the yapsters :)