Monday, June 13, 2011

UGH!

I spoke with the Vet today. The cytology report wasn't so good :(  What he did the other day was take a fluid sample from the lump -- Anthony Weiner (seriously, the humine Anthony Weiner seriously needs to be poked with something). The Vet said there was a very high probability that there were cancerous cells. He was talking about all of these "blasts" things... and honestly, at the time I was too upset to really comprehend.

It isn't a lipoma. So... one option is to do a biopsy to see exactly what the cells are -- and then probably surgery -- or, go straight to the surgery and have the entire lump removed. Tomorrow they are going to call me with an estimate of the cost of the surgery. So, I am opting for the surgery.  Finding the funds to pay for the surgery might be a little difficult (I've been off work for over three months) -- but, he WILL have the surgery, and hopefully, as I have always hoped -- Farfel will live forever. Funny thing, Farfel's Vet called about an hour after my Doc called to give me my surgery date to exchange these THINGS I have in my chest.  My surgery is June 22. At the time I got the news, I was excited, relieved, and happy to be rid of these things -- now... Farfel is my concern.

On a very happy note, while I was at the Vets, he gave me some anti-inflammatory meds for Farfel. His exact words -- "In 24 to 48 hours, you will have a news dog!" It's true. Farfel is acting like a puppy, he has energy, and has been jumping on my bed like a crazy-man!  He is very happy. He really isn't like a new dog, because Farfel is always Farfel no matter what -- but he is a more energetic!!! Farfel and I are happy :)

One thing I will not do is -- if it has spread, and Farfel would need Chemo -- I won't do that to him. Yes, I want him to live forever, and yes, I know he isn't -- but, I can't put an animal through a chemo regimen -- or anything that would be painful, make him sick, and just basically prolong his death because I can't part with him. As intelligent as Farfel is -- there are things he just can't express to me, and in no way could I live with myself if I would be putting him through anything that would be inhumane.


If there comes a time when he has to be put down -- I will be there with him. I know many people who cannot be with their pet during that time. It is totally understandable. I have felt the same way at times. It will be one of the most difficult things I would ever have to do -- but, I will be there with him. He is my best friend :) I love him  :)

I didn't mean for this to turn out depressing. I have a million thoughts going through my head. I am sure Farfel will be just fine, and I am thinking positive thoughts -- but sometimes, during times like these, the reality thoughts have to pop in -- Farfel is a tough guy, and I know he knows it isn't time to leave me. I need him :)

Thank you for listening. It helps to write this down. I promise -- Farfel's "BackStory" is coming  :)   Maybe after I get my REAL fake boobies :)  Star should be home soon  :)  Also, thank you for all of your comments, they are very much appreciated, and enjoyed  :)

Patti






8 comments:

  1. Oh, Farfel....we are crossing our paws really, really hard and saying a few prayers too. We have a lucky horseshoe and we stood it up and filled it with good wishes for you and your mom. Keep us posted.

    Wyatt and Stanzie

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  2. Oh boy. During Moma's recent "stupor" (which has been prolonged), she missed all of this. Now that we've gotten her to read this to us, we have to make her go back and read what we missed.

    This we know. Farfel is in the BEST hands possible. And he knows it. We trust all is going to be okay ... but we want you to know that in the meantime, while you and we wait to find out what "okay" means, you are held close in our hearts and prayers. Even when Moma is too stuporous (didn't know that was a word!) to keep us totally up to date.

    Please forgive her. We have to on a daily basis.

    We love you, Miss Patti. And we love Farfel. Fergi ESPECIALLY loves her Farfel ... 'cause he makes her feel like the Lovely Miss Fergi. As always.

    Muwah.
    Jake (and Fergs) xxxx

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  3. Oh Miss Patti! Just go one step at a time. Our paws are crossed for Farfel!

    -Gizmo, Bart and Ruby

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  4. Our paws are crossed for you, Farfel!
    We love you!

    Maggie and Mitch

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  5. Thank you all for such nice comments. The most comforting thing is -- I know you all know how I feel, and that's what makes it so easy to write my feelings and thoughts. Some people just don't understand how dogs can be in our hearts and mean so much :) It is the most special feeling! There is no drug --- no amount of money that could duplicate the amount of pleasure our furry kids give us :)

    Thank you all again :)

    Patti

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  6. Ciao Farfel,

    La mia ragazza says she isn't inclined to pepper this post with Italian-isms, but instead just wants you to know that we are rooting for you all the way and keeping you in our thoughts. Do you by chance go to my old vet, Dr. Slenn? La mia ragazza thinks he's terrific and wishes he could fly here twice a year for my checkups (or we could go back to Fairlawn to see him and Dr. Ditto). And ... have you talked with Nancy about this? She's just so knowledgeable about Airedales; we're sure she'd be a great help.

    Is Farfel taking prednisone? I took that for a short while before I had de-bumping surgery and it made me hugely thirsty and hungry. La mia ragazza could not put food in my supper dish fast enough, or give me too much water. And, I was very (VERY) active ... which I am always, sort of, anyway...!

    We keep our fingers and paws crossed for you both, Patti and Farfel. (We really, really know just how important and special the Airedale/female human bond is, especially in difficult times.) Please keep us posted.

    Tanti baci!
    Lucia

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  7. Thank you Lucia,

    I love your Italian-isms :) Farfel's surgery is scheduled for Monday, June 20th. I have taken all my dogs for over 20 years to Valley Animal Hospital -- Dr. Sands. Dr. Grguric, is doing the surgery. I have spoken with Nancy -- and she knows a lot about all kinds of dogs :) I think I learn something knew each time I talk to her :) Farfel is on an ibuprofen type medicine -- it has really done a lot for him as far as being more active and happy. He's been on a diet and lost 5 pounds. He weighs 70 pounds now ....a mere shadow of his former self :) So..Farfel's surgery is Monday, and mine is Wednesday -- we will be recuperating together -- nursing our former lumps :) I will be getting new and improved lumps -- Farfel, I don't think cares :)

    Thank you for your very kind comments. We really appreciate them :)

    Patti and Farfel ---- and...Star should be home in the next week or so. Her babies are going to be having an aptitude test :) I think that is so awesome :)

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  8. Ciao, Farfel!

    I just want you to know that I will be keeping paws crossed today, all day, that everything goes well. And, of course, the same holds true for your momma on Wednesday. Santa vacca, what a week you both are having - we wish we could do something to help. Please let us know how things are going ...

    Tanti baci e abbracci, miei cari amici,
    Lucia

    PS: is Patti's family's garden center the one on 21, near Everett (on the way to Nancy's and the Pet Loft, my favorite store!)? La mia ragazza has been there too many times to count. Such a small world...

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